The voice of midnight silence

Waiting for the night to cover the world with its darkness, I woke in my unconsciousness. Dancing with the spirits of animals within me, my soul shined with the divine color of flame that satisfies the existence seeing it. Every inch of the universe greeting it and welcoming the divine existence with its music flows in every stream of water and in every shining star. The light giving the warmth of life and the darkness hiding the eternal secrets; lost in the midst of my thoughts, I began chanting the holy spells that hold the universe together. No matter how satisfying it may be, it faints as I opened my eyes. I was laying at my garden looking up at the sky covered in charcoal that contains diamonds that God sprayed throughout the sky sparkling and winking as though they want to tell me something. The satisfying cold breeze coming from the top of the mountains containing stories of their journey whispers in my ears slowly like a whistling angel. With every breath I take, I fulfill my promise to keep going on. It was like a dream, that night, when I died…

Lost in the beautiful existence of this world, for a moment I forgot that I existed. Enjoying the breeze of the mountains and sound of the water wrestling with the rocks and making its way, I slept under the sky. But I felt something standing beside me, a huge person wearing a dark cloak. I couldn’t help myself to open my eyes. My heart stopped and body trembled with fear. It was standing still yet I felt it’s taking away my life force. Strange feeling traveling in my body, I tilted my head and opened my eyes with fear that I could disappear. But there was nothing there, just the site of the mountain standing tall as they are holding something together.

I stood up and rushed into my room. I laid down at the bed and covered myself. Just when I was about to go to sleep, I heard someone knocking at the door. Although it was locked, I felt like someone’s going to crawl upon my legs and it’s going to swallow me. I asked who it is and there was no response. I stood up and opened the door. There was no sign of someone being there. I thought to myself that maybe the door moved because of the wind and convinced myself that everything’s all right. Just when I closed the door again, I heard it… The voice that spoke with no language I knew, yet I could understand perfectly what it said. Calling out my name, it said to me that my life was about to end. In these last moments, I can do whatever I want to and there will be no judgment of whatever I had done. “Life,” I said. “End,” I said. Nothing but fear covered my heart and life flashed in my vision. My mind froze and the only thing I could do was run, screaming “I don’t want to die; I am too young to die, why now?” Running with my vision trapped in the images of pasts covering my thoughts and making me blind. I could not see the edge of the hill I was living in. I fell from it and that moment was the time I realized something I couldn’t in all of the time I have lived.

It felt like time froze, all of my doings, all of my mistakes flashed before me. I wished for one moment so that I can say sorry to people I hurt. One moment so that I can express my love to people I care about. One moment so that I can forget people who have done wrong with me. I could have sacrificed a thousand of my years just to get that one moment. I never realized until it was too late. One moment…                                                                          

I wondered how many of us rely on tomorrow. How many of us think that someday I will do it. How many of us believe that why should I apologize. Tomorrow holds no promise, yesterday cannot come back. All we have is today, right this moment, right now. Instead of delaying things for tomorrow, do it today because death stands between today and tomorrow and death waits for no one. No matter how rich we become, no matter how developed science be, no matter how high we fly, there’s a bitter reality that no one can escape. Live every day with the best of yourself believing there is no tomorrow.
It’s Jabir… See you around.